Friday, June 15, 2018

One Eye Jax _ new June 2018 poem

A bullet grazed 
My buddy
On the top 
Of his head
Right here 
On this hill top
Old One Eye Jax
Had his gun ablaze 
He wanted him dead
And tried for a few days
Until his plans were stopped 
By a sudden heart attack
It was too much for Jax
Who never paid him back
I guess he wasn’t gonna die
For winning Jax’s eye
Playing Ace’s High
Here’s where Jax 
Tried to shoot you
Up on Coal Hill
With a view 
But you wouldn’t die 
On top of green grass 
Under June blue sky
Now here’s where 
One Eye Jax done lie 
Written at 3 a.m. June 15, 2018
mystrawhat.com & The NewEverydayMedia.com

Saturday, June 2, 2018

"Needed" _ New June Poem

“Needed” 

Chords roam my mind
Like constellations in the sky
Sharp notes 
Bright stars
Flat notes
Cloudy moon
Atmospheric elements 
Which alter our mood
Translated through music
Grouping notes in harmony 
Grouping words for poetry 
Music & poetry here’s our song
It doesn’t matter if it’s short or long
Create it, say it, play it, share it
So the gift doesn’t go away
Being who we are everyday 

5:09 am Saturday June 2, 2018
mystrawhat.com

& TheNewEverydayMedia.com

Friday, June 1, 2018

#Omnipotent _ New June 2018 Poem

#Omnipotent 

Everything on and of this Earth shares a similar fate. 
Our processes for living are very similar if not exact in many cases. 
The way we exist. 
The way we exist at all. 
Birth, breathing, feeding, being, breeding, existing, dying. 
There are so many patterns to recognize

TheNewEverydayMedia.com

Moral Turpitude _ New June 2018 Poem



Question from South Western, PA 
Via @KasieDC for @GOP 
Dear DC, in SW PA parlor rooms
A question does loom
Is there a race to act like a buffoon?
It’s now June
And we assume
You know there’s much more work
To Do instead of running on
Being the world’s biggest jerk?!
Charge, Moral Turpitude 

TheNewEverydayMedia.com

Sunday, May 20, 2018

Sunday’s Thoughts

Sunday's Thoughts

Early morning
I saw a fawn
Eating leaves
Walking the dog
I saw a rabbit
Eating green lawn
I caught a ribbon
Of sunlight from dawn
And pulled it through
From my past to now
What have I become
A poet of the people
Giving voices to those
Who are forgotten ones
Some see useless flesh
Where I see a beautiful rose
I'm just being me
They are everyday heroes
I'm telling their stories
Mindful of history
Intently listening
Giving life to their words
I'm a poet making poetry
From unlikely sources
It's become motor memory
Mixing with new ideas
Galloping in perfection
As do wild horses

Written Sunday Morning
May 20, 2018
John Conte
mystrawhat.com
& TheNewEverydayMedia.com


Good wishes,
John




Thursday, April 5, 2018

“Heart” _ NewMediaArt

"Heart" = blood on paper towel; 3 seconds; 4am; everyday blood from fingertips #newmwdiaart #blood #papertowel #heart #fingertips #everyday   #random #occurrences #perspective 




Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Dealing With the Darkness_ New April 2018 Poem

Dealing With the Darkness

It's easy to get sucked up & in
It's easy to forget how to win
Against the deep gravity of hate
A black stone in your throat you ate
It's so easy for fraud to be pulling you down
As a stooge you sing their song
They saw you coming around 
And you're so prideful you took the bait
And in your heart are seeds of hate 
A master weaver sows and plows along 
While your negativity doesn't pull you through 
The opposite of dark called light to the rescue 
It's more than Ying & Yang needed to save you 
Stop the verses that are cursing your victims 
Your attitude towards life is more than just sins

4/4/18



Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Friday, March 23, 2018

A One Term President _ Stormy March 2018 _ New Media Art


It’s still Lent
And we observe 
At the Friday fish fry
It were the words
We so plainly heard
And We could see
After all these years on TV
People get to say to the liar
Mr. President
You’re fired!



Tee Shirts Are Being Made:

@realDonaldTrump @POTUS 


You’re Fired! 2020

Saturday, March 10, 2018

“Flashing There” — New Poem March 2018

"Flashing There"

Crossing the street
Pedestrians and strangers 
People having purposes
Stacked beer kegs
The delivery truck unloads 
Walking into sunrise 
On a cobblestone road 
A pigeon's wings flap
The sound explodes 
In my consciousness 
Everything lost is now known 
Stopping to write a poem
Tracing where the bird has flown
Like a worm through the hole
These words are now shown
Pulling thread filling the gap
These moments as fast as a flash 
I'm not using a capo
Unless I want what's new to be old
Someone's story that has been told
When it's we who have really grown
Into something built to last 
In the corner the evidence moans
Give it an hour to be exposed 
In the darkroom taken with a flash
Oh there it is now again what a memory 


March 10, 2018 10am
Market Square



Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, March 7, 2018

“Porn Star President” _ New Poem _ March 2018



"Porn Star President"


Porn Stars

Tweet storms

Tariffs & deficits

Pundits employed to predict

@WhiteHouse lessons 

@realDonaldTrump + @jeffsessions 

#HopeHicks and Russia questions 

What's a big deal anymore 

Evangelicals are new reborn devils 

Bullets with bad intent for guns

@tedcruz lyin' to Texuns


March 7, 2018

MyStrawHat.com

& TheNewEverydayMedia.com 




Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Little White Lies _ New Poem February 2018

Little white lies
Is like holding
Little green nuggets 
We're allowed to be high
In D.C.
We in the Government 
Are the molding 
Of perfect little spies
We're the Government 
We can take a scolding 
On Capitol Hill
Then tell the public 
After we've scrubbed it
Swallow your little pill
You'll find the view 
Is good for you
You don't believe me
We're on Air Force One
Have a seat 
Look into my eyes i'll
Make sure you have fun
It'll come clean
If you believe 
In little white lies 
We tell them all the time 

February 28, 2018



Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

“The Microwave Says” _ New February 2018 Poem _



"The Microwave Says" _ New February 2018 Poem _


Reality TV Conservatism 


The Death of Shame


Overcoming Doubts of the Framers


The Mystery of History 


Remarkable America

Leaders Arrive Like A Miracle

Like A Flash Of Sunlight

Common Threads Pulled For All of Us


mystrawhat.com & TheNewEveryDayMedia.com 


Dedicated to Morning Joe





Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Tuesday, February 20, 2018

“Tweetstorm” _ New February Poetry 2018

"Tweet Storm"

In the aftermath 

Of a Presidential Tweet Storm

Lie wounded youths at a Die-In

In front of the White House

Peaceful protests 

For those who whine or gloat

Each party's side in a boat

We need illumination 

A curator of collages 

Tracking the Tweet Storms

- NewEdayMedia 2018 

#original #poetry #tweetstorm #diein #protest #washingtondc #parkland #students #emmagonzalez




Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Space Pot Roots _ New January 2018 Poem

Space Pot Roots

Gravity will pull you down
Reminds you were you come from
But when there's no gravity around
There's no fall to a bottom

Which way do the roots grow
When you're growing pot in space
It's a new business model in the race
To escape the old rules of low

Searching for nutrients and water on earth
Plants evolve roots down with little wiggles
In space studying molecular genetic signals 
Learning how space roots grow is my worth

a.m. January 31, 2018




Good wishes,
John

Sent from my iPhone

Friday, December 22, 2017

Chapter 11: Mister _ "Who's Eating Harry Dick" _ a modern day crime caper _ wrapped-up before Christmas


Chapter 11: Mister 


It was a cold December day in Pittsburgh, Pa. There was a cold sunshine the morning after the first big snow for the city. The neighborhood side streets in Lawrenceville were still a little slippy. The main roads were fine but the crews didn’t get to those side streets yet, which is, in fact, the common case. Detective Bill Crawford closed the wooden front door with its holiday wreath on it and walked down the three concrete steps of Sara Morehouse’s house on Home Street. It was the home she had bought right around the corner from Harry Dick’s in Eden Way. They were supposed to move into it together after Harry Dick sold his house there behind The Abbey on Butler Street. They had official plans to be married in May 2018.

As Detective Crawford walked up towards Butler Street, he felt a warming sensation up his leg when he witnessed how the sun lit up the unlit Seasons Greetings holiday decoration displayed across the front entrance of the Lawrenceville Activities Center. Looking both ways before crossing the street Detective Crawford admired the old solid architecture of the towers and other fortress like attributes The Allegheny Cemetery possesses. And, while looking over his right shoulder down Butler Street, he was once again stricken with the feeling of communion recognizing the structured organization of the great architecture when witnessing the sun’s reflection in his city gaze.   

Once out of the cold the air, Detective Bill Crawford takes a seat at Mister Goods & Grooming right there on Butler. Of course, no other than thee Rhonda Darewyzki is the stylist he sees behind him in the mirror. Rhonda carefully lathers him up for a straight razor shave. Her tasks are methodically performed. It’s as if she’s an artist in the profession of an artisan barber. She sculpted. She cut. She shaved. She wiped away until she rediscovered that silver glint of the blade. 

Earlier that morning the local NEWS everyone watches in Pittsburgh, Channel 4 WTAE, reported that the head of a 12 point buck had been cut-off and stolen from Schnur’s Meat Market in Butler after the hunter dropped the majestic buck off for processing. The teenage hunter and her boyfriend were interviewed and apparently pretty bummed out on missing having such a prized trophy to showcase to the world. 

On camera she declared that no one could ever take away that feeling she knows from having the perfect shot that killed a red blooded, pulsating, breathing, dashing, virile mammal, such as, this 12 point buck. The teenager ended the interview stating how the greatest feeling, not only in the hunters firmament, but, in her entire life, was known to her while holding the mass in her hands. She repeated how nobody could take that away from her.

“I thought Harry Dick was like all men. Numb in the brain and numb in the heart.” Rhonda stopped frantically. “Oh I’m sorry. I nicked you!” She dabbed a Kleenex in the cut oozing red bubbly blood. “Are there any men out there with a good brain and a good heart?” Rhonda sighed. Bill Crawford was upright staring in mirror. He noticed how red Rhonda’s lips really were. Seductive. Red.

Red as the blood that was his on the Kleenex Rhonda was placing into a mason jar on top of the antique dresser at her station. Detective Crawford didn’t get any connection as his interests were influenced by the lettering tattooed on Rhonda’s hips. She had on denim jeans pegged at the ankles. Her tights were showing through the holes in her naturally faded Levis that rested low on her hips. It was the first day of winter so it was a little cold and recently had snowed. Though not nearly enough to be snowed-in. Rhonda had on a blue hoodie that zipped up and was also wearing a royal blue bra underneath that. The hoodie was small and tight. Detective Crawford read the word on top of her right hip “Put” it read. And then he read the word on top of her right hip “In” it read.

Soon Rhonda’s clean and sterile straight razor blade was back on Detective Crawford’s throat as he eased on back in the barber chair. She kinda had to stratal his right leg to go with the contour of his rough beard. Detective Crawford embarrassingly jerked a bit when he felt the warm inner legs of Rhonda against his bony knee. Detective Crawford was cut again. This time it wasn’t Rhona’s fault and she let him know about it. “Look what you made me do,” she smirked as she dabbed once again at his bloody skin. 

Rhonda paused and deliberately asked, “so why can’t the investigators get to that body in the river to identify the body?” She was asking Detective Crawford loud enough so that others in the Goods & Grooming shop could hear. It was on everyone’s minds anyway. Was that body in the river that of Detective Harry Dick “the city chicken cannibal” serial killer? “Officials say it’s too dangerous,” Detective Crawford retorted, “just like the reports on the local news.” 

MOON TOWNSHIP (WTAE) – Efforts to recover a body from the Ohio River have hit a setback.
Moon Township Police say officers and workers at the Dashields Dam lost sight of the body on Wednesday. Police say it could be under the dam or it may have moved down the river.
Police say the body had been caught in the backwash of the dam. The river has been too high and conditions have been too dangerous to attempt a recovery.
“It is sort of a waiting game unfortunately – we’re sensitive to the family and this is someone’s loved one and it’s hard and if it was my loved one I would want to recover it, but the reality of it is we couldn’t recover it safely,” Seamon said.
According to police, a tow boat crew first observed the body in the Ohio River on Monday. They attempted to catch up to the body before it went over the Dashields Dam, but were unable to do so.
Once police recover the body, they will work to figure out where the body entered the water and how the person died.
The night of what was the last gruesome murder by the City Chicken Cannibal Serial Killer at the scene of the McKees Rocks Bridge a driver on the bridge told investigators he saw what he believed to be a man all dressed in black like a Ninja of sorts go over the bridge. Was it Detective Harry Dick? Was Detective Harry Dick the infamous “City Chicken Cannibal Serial Killer?!"
Just as the Bucks up in the hillsides of the way back, once then farmland above the Smoky City learned to share their habitat with residential and commercial suburbanites, naturally learning they’re less likely to be shot and killed in close together confines of backyards, alleys, public parks, and structures of businesses - today’s Bucks in the once “sticks” or “boonies” outside the city limits casually have adapted to sprawling greater metropolitan development.  

Even out on old man Benson’s land, where The 10 Point Buck was teaching the white tail and younger bucks to live and flourish among the meadows, beds and thickets of the deep woods in spring, summer, early fall and mid to late winter. However, during those weeks that coincided with riffle season, the 10 point led the others to the commercial development, residential neighborhoods, property of churches, graveyards and nursing homes. Living and eating and sleeping and roaming in the land of big box structures. That’s where Harry Dick’s 10 Point Buck was now with his white tails.

Mother Nature looked favorably upon the clean karma of The 10 Point Buck. It used its senses and psychic energy to prudently live the ways of the wise old bucks staying alive everyday until a natural death - having its flesh picked apart by coyotes and scavenger birds, such as, large turkey vultures and black crows. The cycle of life and death complete. Flesh and bone used to nourish living life. While the hooves, antlers and hide decomposed as bugs, parasites and bacteria eased the gentle giant of sun, moon and stars back-to-the-earth. Feasting as they work.

While the mystery of “The City Chicken Cannibal Serial Killer” goes unsolved, the 10 Point Buck at old man’s Benson’s farm awakes either way. If Harry Dick is dead, the Buck continues keeping on, and, if Harry Dick is alive, the Buck keeps on keeping on with the spirit and wisdom of Mother Nature. 

Meanwhile back on Butler Street, in Lawrenceville, at Mister Grooming and Goods, Detcetive Bill Crawford has the vision of those two words on each side of Rhonda Darewyzki’s upper hips seared into his consciousness, “Put” and “In” … There was something plainly obvious about those words together on her soft white skin.


Chapter 11: Mister 
_ "Who's Eating Harry Dick" _ a modern day crime caper _ wrapped-up before Christmas 
Copyright 2017 John Alan Conte, Jr. mystrawhat.com & TheNewEverydaymedia.com

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Chapter 10: End Game _ "Who's Eating Harry Dick" _ a modern day crime caper



Chapter 10: End Game



Most cities only have one river and one river valley. Pittsburgh has three rivers and three river valleys. Two of the rivers fall down from mountainous valleys to come together to meet and form the Ohio River. Where the three rivers meet is a vortex. Mighty ley lines joining in union and in cosmic alchemy creating an energy vortex. The early occupiers of this fruitful, lush land, unblemished by the disruption of industrialization, referred to it and treated it as a “sacred spot.” 

Lewis & Clark termed this triangular piece of land where the three rivers meet, “the forks.” By the time a young King Loui IV of France would come to explore the same unsettled wilderness west of Fort Duquesne and Fort Layfeyette, at the forks, the confluence, Pittsburgh was termed “gateway to the west.” 

On a morning like this one at the confluence, Friday, December 1, 2017, where the Allegheny River and the Mononnghehela River reach the end of their valleys spilling their essence into the Ohio River Valley - forming the Ohio River - it appeared mysterious and mystifying over this triangular point (many years later termed “the Golden Triangle”). Before dawn would be unveiled, exposing the city of the three rivers and its populated towns along the three river valleys, and vast hillsides, the dense fog made it impossible to see out of the darkness. 

The dirty dark past of Pittsburgh would have Pittsburgh painted this coal black during actual daytime hours because of all the smoke, ash, and soot from the hundreds of mills and burning of coal for just about everything needed to forge one of the biggest and wealthiest and most productive cities in the world. It was well documented. Pittsburgh was dubbed “the smoky city” and “hell with the lid off” back when the smell of sulfur and smoke literally choked your lungs. Public Health Data has studies that conclude that once the lungs of an average everyday Pittsburgher were as black as those employed to work in the coal mines. 

But, in modern day, and dawn of the new, new Pittsburgh, the river valleys are as clean as they have been for a long, long time. Not quite as clean as back when the Native American Indians thrived in the fertile river valleys good to loyal tribes - burning torches and keeping the fires lit in the predawn days at the end of a long harvest season. Essentially, things were getting better in terms of pristine environmental conditions in 2017 under Pittsburgh Mayor Spudutto, complete with a long lasting, prolonged. gorgeous “Indian Summer” as the WTAE weather personalities would refer to it - "being how it’s unusually warm for this time of year."

Mornings, nevertheless, were indeed as “chilly" as WTAE morning news anchor, Bofta Yiman, would describe. The rivers had not come close to freezing yet due to all the warm weather. There were frosts in the higher elevations and north of the city up towards New Castle, PA and Lake Erie. However, the region still had not experienced that dramatic drop in temperature yet that would force a human’s skin to freeze and get “frost bite” having been exposed to the frigid cold for an unwanted duration of time. 

This particular morning would eventually unveil a sunny, pleasantly warm autumn Friday.  First it would endure the crazy kind of fog which the WTAE weather-cam was showing live on air.  Making the weather-forcaster read off of her prompter, “crazy fog over Pittsburgh.”  This description would prove to be accurate in more ways than one.

As the fog continued to persist it veiled the cityscape which was barely even visible. Only the tip of the tallest building in Pittsburgh - the USX Steel Tower - was visible in the Fog Advisory. This was the kinda fog dangerous for hunters. Each year hunters were shot in the woods of Western Pennsylvania during deer rifle season. In this dense fog it would be utterly foolish to expect to shoot and kill your hunt. When the muffled and muted shades and patches of pinks, purples, reds and gold eventually give way to full rays of brilliant sunrise, once the thick fog finally dissipates, then it is safe to shoot in the distance and kill your hunt. 

Harry Dick found a dead body of a hunter in the woods once as a licensed youth deer hunter. Harry Dick found the dead body of a hunter under some leaves piled-up against a mossy log and never told anyone about it. As the years went on he would become conflicted about this encounter. 

In this kind of Fog Advisory the Pittsburgh region was under, if you’re one of those rare people out at 6:30 a.m. you’ll only find a certain subset of people out & about along with you. Paramedics, firemen, police officers, delivery drivers for bakeries and food distribution, dog walkers, joggers, baristas, newspaper delivery drivers, waste management workers, people who need their coffee made for them. Someone, such as an everyday dog walker, would certainly welcome the brights lights of rot iron lamp posts and the holiday lights on trees, houses, storefronts and decorations in the dark, let alone, on a dense foggy morn. 

The over travelled roadway to downtown Pittsburgh called Ohio River Boulevard Route 65 is a rut many daily drivers find themselves in hours of the morning most of us would rather spend in a warm cozy bed. It was ungodly to some people to be up at this hour driving to work. Most drivers didn’t look beyond the rut ahead of them. Today they couldn’t see anything anywhere but straight ahead anyhow because it was a crazy foggy day with little to zero visibility. 

Approaching the McKees Rocks Bridge on Route 65 are butting-up concrete sidewalks lined by rot iron railings protecting pedestrians and vehicles from going over the 100 foot + cliffs up above the river. Down below on the flat river banks are railroad tracks. Also down below is ALCOSAN. And there’s a penitentiary. Across the river is the town of McKees Rocks and the spot still known as “the Indian Mound.” On a normal day it would be visible along with the city scape of downtown Pittsburgh and Mt. Washington above it. It was a cool view of the city on days with normal visibility. 

There was nothing normal to the beginning of this day. The animal control worker called out to the scene was the kind of woman who would gladly declare, “morning!” She greets just about everyone like this everyday before noon. The dialect is between a proper northeastern, “good morning;” and a southern “morning y’all;" and a midwestern, “morning!” She loved animals and loved her job despite the sometimes cruel and unusual way deviant and violent offenders treated animals. But this gruesome discovery broke her. 

At first, as dawn was unveiled in the fog of the morning light, calls were coming in about a large dog. There were a couple calls for a creepy halloween prop. Yet nothing came in which accurately met the horror. This would be the most bizarre crime scene Pittsburgh would see in its history of documenting such events for public record. This was beyond savage.

It wasn’t a large dog. It wasn’t a halloween prop stolen from a yard of a family that didn’t bother to make that transition yet into holiday season mode. What it was took a little detective work to figure out and try and explain. For the sake of decency and respect for the kind of law and order President Donald J. Trump and his Attorney General, Jeff Sessions, decree should not ever be made a mockery of - we will omit details here and stick with basic facts for public consumption. 

A male body was found handcuffed to the sidewalk's rot iron railing along the Brighton Heights section - southbound side - of Route 65 - at the McKees Rocks Bridge -approaching downtown. It was hard to see this overgrown, unkept, litter filled area of sidewalk, in any event, due to the lack of efficient overhead street lamps there. The male body was decapitated, and, in place of the victims head was that of a pig. A pig’s head was sown onto the neck of the male body. There was a thick dog chain chained around the neck and the rot iron railing securing the weight of the large pig’s head sown onto the male body. The male body did not have identification on it. 

The male body was that of a man in his mid-twenties. The male body was otherwise naked for the execption of a thin cloak or sheet of some sort made out of some type of hair. Not like the camel hair garment that John The Baptist covered his body with, but, what looked like human hair. Made out of human hair. It was a fabric like mesh made out of human hair. The male’s body was cut up. Again, at the discretion of the President and his A.G., we are not permitted to share the words and symbols carved into the epidermis of the victim.

Routinely dispatched to county homicide scenes, Detectives Rusty Jones and Bill Crawford were called to the location. The initial calls, findings, and decisions were all handled routinely by locality protocols, per usual, until the unusualness of the crime scene was evident. The F.B.I. would soon be on the scene. Once the autopsy would be performed it would reveal the crafty sowing capabilities of the serial killer “the city chicken cannibal.” Where the victim’s heart would be, was a toy sheriff’s badge. 

After Harry Dick was an unresponsive no-show to the urgent calls Detectives Rusty Jones and Bill Crawford made to him from this latest murder scene, they had a haunch they should drive to his parent’s farm for some answers. Where was Harry Dick? Harry Dick’s whereabouts could not be accounted for for a couple days now. The Chief and Detectives Jones and Crawford had made numerous attempts to get-a-hold of Detective Harry Dick.

Driving along the white fencing down the lane leading to the Dick’s farmhouse, Detectives Jones and Crawford were able to spot Harry’s Dad outside of the barn. He was inside the pig pen and the gate was wide open so that the Detectives could see most of the pigs inside the pen. As they exited their vehicle and started towards Mr. Dick he cautioned them, “my pigs are a little stressed this morning so please walk slowly around them and be careful not to try and further excite them with your movements and voices.” The pigs weren’t the only ones who were stressed. Harry Dick’s dad looked horrible.

One of Sam Dick’s pigs had been killed. Sam Dick was confused, sad and angry. Sam Dick turned to the detectives and asked, “who would do such a thing? Who would cut off the head of a pig, a well taken care of farm animal, and take it, and leave the body in the pen like this?” He was kinda tearful when saying his carefully spoken words. “Poor Darren,” Sam Dick lamented, “he was one of the most intelligent, friendly, funny pigs I ever raised in all my years of farming.” He was petting one of the pigs that was hovering around him almost like a dog would do around its owner when company arrives. “And, poor Charlotte here!” Sam Dick was staring right into the faces of Jones and Crawford as he tried to keep it together, “this sow here is going to miss her daddy. Her daddy’s gone. Gone, baby, gone. Your love has gone away."

Sam Dick was confused indeed. Providing low-stressed, healthy and humanely treated livestock was the pride of Sam Dick’s life. Maybe even more so than his wife Henrietta and sons Chet and Harry Dick. He loved his farm animals. He loved and treated his animals well, from the time they were born, until the time they were prayed over before being humanely butchered by Sam himself or approved trained apprentices of Sam. This was serious business to Sam Dick, a man of ethics. Animals that sacrifice their lives for our nutritional needs and well being in order to live deserve to be respected. It wasn’t too far off from the native Shawnee that lived on the Dick property before it was settled.

Detectives Crawford and Jones raced to Harry Dick’s home, in the city, in Lawrenceville. They pulled into Eden Way and entered Harry Dick’s home. No one answered the door after a good bit of pounding. “Harry!” The detectives were hollering. Nothing seemed too odd or out of place. But then they stumbled upon surprise number one. On a chalkboard in the kitchen were dinner features with extremely exotic, rare recipes. The header at the top of the chalkboard read, “Today’s Features: F U.” 

The latest victim found murdered at the McKees Rocks Bridge was definitely fit-to-order by the main suspect “the city chicken cannibal” serial killer. Missing head. Missing heart. This was astonishingly different though because of the fact that in the place of the victim’s head was a sown on pig’s head. Newly slaughtered. And sown shut into the chest cavity, a tin toy sheriff’s badge there where the heart should be located. Could Harry Dick possibly be an offender? Could Detective Harry Dick really be a socio-path, narcissistic, obsessive, sick, twisted, violent, cannibal, serial killer, abusing his power, wanting the ultimate control over life and death? 

Down the stone steps to Harry Dick’s cellar a stench hit Detectives Jones and Crawford that was so strong not even the lingering of burning incense could mask it. They often thought Harry’s clothes smelled like incense because he did what a lot of cops do, and, that is, pinch a little marijuana from the office’s confiscation stash, no big deal! They figured Harry Dick was like the burn-out-type of “hoopy” hick from the country that he often honestly portrayed to be to them. A lot of cops pinched confiscated stashes for friends & family - sometimes even selling it on the side to these folks for a little extra pocket change.

At any event, they never thought in a million years that they’d find out what they found out at this time, this very moment. In mason jars in Harry Dick’s canning cellar were canning shelves storing hearts and brains. The rows of mason jars were well organized on the shelves. They were even chronologically dated. An old pot belly stove is what Harry Dick used to cook his meat. It was there in the cellar. And, on top of the pot belly stove’s cooking surface, was something ungodly, unimaginable to Detectives Jones & Crawford. There was a note beside the prepared dishes. It was a now familiar message. Typed out neatly on an index card - it read, “eat me.”



Chapter 10: End Game _ "Who's Eating Harry Dick" _ a modern day crime caper

Copyright 2017 John Alan Conte, Jr. mystrawhat.com & TheNewEverydaymedia.com

Friday, December 8, 2017

Chapter 9: Happy Holidays _"Who's Eating Harry Dick" _ a modern day crime caper _


Chapter 9: Happy Holidays



It was black outside and at the kitchen table Harry Dick sat listening to the local morning news, drinking his coffee. More teens were shot. Additionally, more teens were shot, and killed. More people were shot. And, more people were shot, and killed. Notably, a 3 year old and a 10 year old were shot over the weekend during a drive-by-shooting, plus the others. 

Harry wrote in a notebook. Each January 1st Harry opened a brand new note book with fresh clean white pages that were fantastically blank. Harry kept track each and everyday of the shootings and killings reported by the local morning news throughout the year in this notebook. It was November 28, 2017. Detective Harry Dick put the data points together and was trying to connect the dots. What trends in the data would call his mind to attention? 

Thanksgiving kicked off the holiday season and Friday was the first of December. Soon this year would be over and it would be 2018. It didn’t look good. It was overwhelmingly glaring. There were more unsolved murders than solved murders. There were more shootings with no suspects than shootings with apprehended suspects. As a homicide detective this bothered him. But, as a human being, was he as numb and callous to crime, shootings, killings and death that plagued our towns, our cities, our country, our world?

Today was the day that Sara Morehouse and her mother were to meet Harry’s mother for a late lunch. Sara and her mother were going wedding dress shopping first. Harry Dick and Sara Morehouse set a date to be married in the spring of 2018. It would be a May wedding. As Sara drove her car along Route 65 the autumn sun glimmered on top of the Ohio River and shimmered off of the railroad tracks running parallel to the boulevard they travelled to Beaver County. Henrietta suggested they meet half way in the town Beaver at the landmark Wooden Angel restaurant. 

Sara was beaming. She was so excited. She and her mother had found an amazing wedding dress! Sara was already daydreaming about the big day and how she would look in her wedding dress. And how Harry Dick would look next to her dressed up in a tuxedo. Daydreaming how she would be the center of attention. Sara’s mother, and her mother’s money, and her mother’s stature, would make sure of it. Sara’s mother was a judge. Sara’s father, Milton Morehouse, was also a judge (God rest his soul). Milton Morehouse had a partnership within a successful regional private practice before he took to the bench becoming a judge. When he passed, Sara’s mother, Jane, took complete control of the estate. 

Jane insisted that her daughter Sara must shop at the new occasion boutique in the Sewickley Village called Luna. It was a brand new boutique in Sewickley that had just recently opened. And, all the society “tea and crumpet ladies” clamored to find out who was buying who to wear, and, to wear to what event! It soon became Sewickley area central. The owner and workers were well sought out after at Starbucks on Beaver & Locust streets and, also, at the Adesso Cafe on Walnut Street in the Sewickley Village. Women with such valuable information where of utmost importance to the “gossipy, trendy, Nouveau Riche” and Judge Jane Morehouse knew how to exploit it. Her daughter Sara would be one of the first women in Pittsburgh to buy an exquisite wedding dress from Luna and be a May bride in Spring 2018. 

After about a half of a dozen dresses, Sara selected the Penalara Wedding Dress. It was from the YolanCris collection that brings innovative trends, such as, the off the shoulders boho wedding dresses. Hers she chose was absolutely striking with a deeply sophisticated silhouette and, with bulky sleeves in tulle, and, so many lace edgings. It was absolutely exquisite and exclusive. As the owner of Luna relayed practically verbatim - YolanCris, founded by two sisters in 2005, Yolanda and Christina, is a fashion house specializing in haute couture wedding dresses and evening wear. These romantic, hand crafted dresses are designed with the natural authentic woman in mind. That was Sara Morehouse. She was Detective Harry Dick’s little “white-tail” doe as he fondly and affectionately called her as she cooed like a morning dove. There were pigeons lined up the whole way across a few of the colossal street lamps strategically placed along Route 65 around Conrail Yards. Jane commented on it to her daughter as Sara continued down the boulevard. 

At the Wooden Angel the ladies would toast with pink champagne, eat Waldorf salads, and rack of lamb, while discussing wedding plans. Of course, the Penalara Wedding Dress from the YolanCris collection at Luna Botique in the Sewickley Village, would be slowly and throughly discussed. 
Women love the finer details of things and the more detail the better. Henrietta didn’t have any objections to Jane’s decisions as host for the wedding of Mr. Harry Dick and, soon to be, Mrs. Sara Morehouse Dick. Sara never took her first husband’s last name. Maybe that was foreshadowing on her part, or, her late father who suggested it. 

The wedding ceremony would be held at the Sewickley Presbyterian Church and the reception at the Edgeworth Club in Edgeworth / Sewickley. For the rehearsal dinner, Judge Jane Morehouse would have Sam & Lori at Vivo Kitchen in Sewickley shut down the restaurant to the public for the evening and host the private event. Sam & Lori would do their thing perfect as usual. It was all first class, proper Sewickley Heights money. Harry Dick would be entering a family of old Sewickley Heights money.

Both Detectives Rusty Jones and Bill Crawford were expected to be invited to the wedding. Despite the mounting pressure from the Chief and the Mayor to close in on “the city chicken cannibal” - Jones & Crawford were determined to take Harry Dick out to celebrate his engagement. Plans had been made and confirmed for them to go out and they were looking forward to cutting-loose a little on the town. They wanted to do so before the holiday season fully kicked-in and establishments would be booked and overcrowded with holiday parties. But, the contents of the meeting in the Chief’s office that Harry Dick skipped wasn’t something the tweedy twins wanted to hash-over with Harry Dick. That’s for sure.

The sun lit the sky a fiery stained glass red color - slowly flowing like slag under the clear horizon - as Detectives Jones & Crawford hit a nice vantage point crossing the South Highland Bridge revealing a magical-looking late autumn early sun set. 15th century renaissance painters painted intense skies like this sky. It was a day with plenty of sunshine and in the mid-fifties for the temperature. Whereas, just a few days ago there was blood-on-tracks below, glittery sunset and streetlights coming on now shined like gold glitter right there on that spot. As the two detectives walked their gait showcased well tailored inseams hemmed with cuffs of their tweed suits. The suits were tailored so well, that as they moved at the waist and shoulders to turn to each other discussing the meeting in the Chiefs office earlier in the afternoon, there was no hint of uncomfortable pulling, pinching or catching across the chest and shoulders. It was a smart look.

Jones & Crawford were absolutely clear the F.B.I. was now taking over the case and Harry Dick would be besides himself. The Chief broke-it-down in his office where Harry Dick was absent. Working on some hot lead he couldn’t pull out of at the moment. That’s what he had told Detectives Jones & Crawford to tell the Chief. The lead field agent for the F.B.I. was present as well and, surprisingly, did not demean the work of Detectives Jones & Crawford. That was a surprise to them having expected it. Technically, it had to happen this way now. There was no other choice, no other decision, no other command, no other order. “Stand down now boys,” the Chief proclaimed, “and let the F.B.I. do its job.” Quite frankly Jones & Crawford appeared relieved. Making it crystal clear, the Chief added, “and tell Detective Dick it’s too late.” The Chief paused to motion towards the F.B.I. agent sitting to the right of Chief’s desk then barked, “whatever Detective Dick thought was such a priority not to be here - have him turn it over, now!” The Chief was sour, “he’s not returning my calls!”

The energy of the East End started to take hold of the night. There was an electricity that could not be denied. People were out and about, and, because of the unseasonable warm sunny weather, were in general cherry, good moods. Plus, it was the holiday season and festive lights and decorations were everywhere. Out on the sidewalk in front of Addas Coffe & Teahouse on S. Highland, a sage at Carnegie Mellon University (CMU) was holding court with his disciples. As Jones & Crawford passed bye the sage could be heard articulating that like the South Highland Bridge which existed before them - connecting the history of the East End to the present reality of the East End - he too was a bridge. His disciples were transfixed by his every notion. He presented the notion that he was a bridge between millennials, who had no experience with 20th century and 19th century culture, and the baby boomers, who knew and were even raised by some people born in the late 1800’s. It was an interesting perspective. 

It was apparent that Detective Harry Dick was standing-up Detectives Jones & Crawford for drinks and dinner at The Urban Tap. Nick was bartending. At the bar, they were two Jefferson’s Ocean bourbon Manhattans in when the idea of meeting-up with Harry Dick left them. The case was out of their hands. They could relax a little and celebrate the reason of the season. Continuing with their streak of Asian, Arab and MIddle-Eastern university girls. Well, young professionals weren’t excluded, if they were still going out and participating in the mix of things. That is. 

It was great. Those university types had their daddy’s money and were looking to rebel and be bad for a night. And, the medical students were too busy for anything serious and just wanted to blow off some steam for a night. Daddy wouldn’t allow two lowly detectives as husbands anyhow - no two ways about it. As for the young professionals still in the mix maybe looking for something a bit more steady & stable to introduce to the parents as a show of progress - well, daddy wouldn’t approve of two Caucasian lowly county homicide detectives anyways either. So, there was little chance any of these fetish flings would last at all. This was part of the new, new Pittsburgh dating scene: an influx of exotic, rich, educated Asian, Arabic and Middle-Eastern women introduced to the local homegrown garden-variety that naturally inhabited Pittsburgh.

Jones & Crawford found a party of six exotic hotties out celebrating for the night. In the warm November evening the young women were radiant. Their shiny, luscious, thick black hair bouncing-around-the-room while depicting the epitome of comfort and luxury in brand label clothing, shoes and accessories.  Pulsating real life Emojis. One looked like an anime princess. This was a higher grade than what Jones & Crawford would’ve found had they gone to where most native born Pittsburgh men instinctually gravitate towards - Mario’s on the SouthSide, or, Tequila Junction on the North Shore. Both would be jam packed - guaranteed. Each of the girls had perfect white teeth and smiles. Eyes that were big and full of optimism like primary colors of a color chart. Furthermore, important to both detectives, most of them had made fashion choices in shoes that exposed their toes. Perfectly pedicured little feet.

Detective Bill Crawford was particularly amazed how all of their ten toes were beautifully pedicured. He kept commenting on how they weren’t all gnarly like the girls from the Greenfield neighborhood that he grew-up-in in the city. Greenfield wasn’t too far from were they were in Shadyside, though, it was a world away in cultural norms. Surprisingly, that could not be detected in Bill Crawford. He was "turning out all right” as Jimmy from the old neighborhood would say of him. He kept them laughing while Detective Jones played it more straight like the more serious one of the pair. Actually, they had it so down-pat, Jones & Crawford could have their own TV show. Geesh, if Jimmy could see the young woman Bill Crawford bedded with tonight during the annual "holiday season hunt” - he’d double-down on that testimony if pressed! Rusty Jones took one home into the liquid night too. All and all the evening was a success. 


Chapter 9: Happy Holidays _"Who's Eating Harry Dick" _ a modern day crime caper _

Copyright 2017 John Alan Conte, Jr. mystrawhat.com & TheNewEverydaymedia.com